Jake's Summary

Two concepts have been competing as the subject of my meditation. The first is the interplay between imperfectness and perfectness. I tried to feel perfection and completeness without the Word, without the brain. This might be a way to see without the concept. The concepts only allow to approximate reality. I tried meditating directly on imperfectness and see if I could see a contradiction appear, this being a very mathematical approach. To go further along this path, I need to surpass the fear of undoing the progress I have done. This fear could be surpassed by questioning the nature of what is 'progress'.

The second meditation was trying to stop. I tried stopping and relaxing. It seems there are two types of stopping: the rigid and the fluid. One is done by injunction and the other by suggestion. I find that the first seems to represses what wants to come up and bring a less pleasant feeling in the day, which does not necessarily mean it is a bad approach. Meditation on thoughtlessness is related to the relaxing. I find that thoughtlessness might be in fact a sort of openness.

In my last meditation, while being 'without' thoughts, the ideas of another possible meditation arose. Concentrating on the duality or difference between the mind and the body could help to see completeness.

In the day after morning meditations I rarely felt good. I think those meditations stir some things inside. I feel I am pushing on a membrane that is not breaking. Why does such practices result on immediate discomfort and long term benefits?